Yes, the first time attempting sex after having a baby is truly memorable. But it's also different for everyone (although lubricant really does appear to be a common theme), and that's why we asked our audience to tell us about their experiences in their own words.
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Many moms are given the green light to resume sexual activity at their six-week postpartum checkup. For some women, having sex six weeks after giving birth might seem LOL impossible. And that's normal. Others might feel ready to do it sooner than six weeks postpartum. That's also normal (although please check with your doctor or midwife before you rip off that bandaid, as having sex too soon can put you at risk for infection and other health issues).
I didn't rip or receive sutures, so my doc told me anytime I felt like having sex again, I was more than good to go. So two weeks later, sleep deprived, breast full of milk, smelling like I haven't showered for two to three days, I decided it was time to get things going.
LOTS of (foreplay) to be very sure it's time to put 'the thing' inside. And then the feeling, I will always remember. It felt like shaving blade ripping the inside of my vagina. We did stop at that moment. And then I remembered what prenatal care class taught us about olive oil. Did you know olive oil is a great natural lubricant? Well, I didn't until then, but I can guarantee it works wonders.
My best advice is to take it slow, and remember that lube is your best friend after having kids! Hormone fluctuations and exhaustion really changes things up, so it's really just easier to give your body that extra help."
The first time, we waited because I tore internally very badly and was losing stitches for months, and then I was afraid. But, we also waited because being a new mom and constantly having a baby nursing left me uninterested. Which is also why we waited after other babies too. Part of being touched out, tired and just not interested. My husband has always been respectful and never initiated. He saw what I went through and how traumatic it can be.
Becoming intimate after a new baby didn't start with intercourse. It really started with romantic make-out sessions. And I think that helped make it better. It was slow, gentle and I set the pace. Being intimate after a baby can be painful and for me, not being pressured helped. And our bodies change so much after having a baby. Our bodies are softer, things we used to like might not feel good anymore. So taking the time to figure it all out and being comfortable with your new body can take some time.
There's also the fact that when nursing, there is a "not above the waist" rule. All part of rediscovering each other. The relationship changes and so does the the physical relationship. Well, it did for us anyways. It doesn't have to be negative, it can be fun! And having a very understanding and loving partner helps."
On 28 July 2021, during a call with Isabella "Bella" Loretta Janke, Chris revealed the details of his sexual activities with his mother of his own volition, also discussing it in text messages later that day. In those, Chris discussed stimulating his elderly mother with his hands, performing cunnilingus on her, and having penetrative sex with her.[4] He claimed that Barbara compared him favorably to her previous sexual partners, including Chris's father Bob, who had been unable to provide her with an orgasm or stimulate her G-spot.
As early as October 2015, the Man in the Pickle Suit noted that at Chris's plea arrangement for the pepper spray incident, Chris and his mother were touching each other in an unusually intimate and inappropriate fashion.[7] As recently as 2019, Chris, whilst roleplaying as Magi-Chan, referred to his mother as a "guilty pleasure waifu[sic]". Furthermore, in August 2016, Chris admitted to having dreams of having sex with his mother in a Facebook post stating that "I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with my mother".[1] Troll Arthur Spatchcock disclosed on the Kiwi Farms that following the 2014 house fire, Chris and his mother were routinely spooning. At the time, Chris denied any impropriety, stating "I am not a 'Bates'. OMG."[8]
According to both Bella and MKRNightVee, Chris brought up the dreams of sex with his mother again to them in private conversations. In a 19 July 2021 conversation with the Chess Club Discord server, Bella mentioned that Chris, during his phase of role-playing as Sonichu, brought up that he had a dream of having sex with his mother, to which Bella replied that it was weird and questioned what it meant, to which an offended Chris asked if she was calling Chris weird.[9] On 30 July 2021, MKR commented about the leak of the incest news, and mentioned that Chris had told her about sexual dreams with his mother, and that MKR dismissed it as one of Chris's many crazy dreams.[10]
Prior to the allegations being revealed to the public, Chris informed Bella, Null, and The WCT about the fact that he found a boyfriend-free girl, although he wanted her identity to remain secret. He offered multiple hints about the identity of his new sweetheart, but told Null that he wanted him to figure out who it was. Null was initially skeptical of the incest claims, since the Idea Guys previously coerced him into recording a (then untrue) statement that he had raped Barb, and believed that this could be another instance of similar manipulation. Null hypothesized that Chris was attempting to protect the identity of his new girlfriend by making up an elaborate lie, but eventually came to realize that Chris had been having frequent sex with Barb upon reviewing Chris's hints.[26]
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"Teens who talk with their parents about sex are more likely to put off having sex until they're older," HHS said. "They're also more likely to make healthy choices, like using condoms to prevent pregnancy and STDs [sexually transmitted diseases], if they do choose to have sex."
Like Revere, many of the women who become caregivers end up having to quit their jobs. They often now find themselves financially vulnerable and "extremely isolated," says Portacolone. "So like Jacquelyn [Revere], the unpaid caregiver of her mother for six years, they are left to their own devices." 2ff7e9595c
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